‘Does it scare you?’

It was a simple question, but it caught me off guard.

We talked about our perfect heavenly bodies tonight in class, and as an example of our imperfect bodies here, I told the kids about RP. I explained that I’ll be disease-free in heaven.

But, I wasn’t ready for the questions.

“Wait, Ms. Elizabeth, you mean you know you’ll be blind one day?”

“No, because God works miracles, and every case is different. I may never have any major issues with it. We’ll see what God allows.”

“Does it scare you?”

“Yes, sometimes it does. But do you know what makes it OK? I can still tell others about Jesus even if I can’t see.”

I don’t think about my eyes often, and it’s something I choose not to obsess over. I have a “What if…?” for every situation, and I could easily work myself up over this, but I will not do it.

Still, when one of my students asked that question about if it scares me, I had to be honest. It does scare me sometimes. It’s not always OK. Sometimes I think about all the things I might never see again, and it crushes me in my moments of little faith.

But God… That’s one of my favorite phrases. It shows up in the most hopeless of situations throughout the Bible, and it’s shown up in the most hopeless situations in my life, too. Read about Noah, Joseph and David, as well as from the many letters in the New Testament. You’ll see those “But God” moments everywhere.

Even when thinking about RP has me down, I can’t help but remember the faithfulness of God. Remembering how He has brought me through some desperate moments and difficult situations comforts me and assures me that my eyes are safe in His care. He is not surprised by this, and as I have said before, I won’t be able to see one day longer than is in His plan.

I may be scared and have little faith sometimes, but like I told my students tonight, I still can tell others about the love of God and the Gospel without vision. It won’t stop me from teaching His great promises, and that does make it OK.

Update: I had a good report last month, and it turns out the FDA has approved a drug to treat RP, so if my eyes take a downward turn, the specialist will discuss the drug with me. God works through medicine!

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